One liners to get you laughing today...

Image via WikipediaNo matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

The maths teacher confiscated  a rubber band slingshot in her class because it was a weapon of maths disruption.

Where can men over the age of 60 find younger, sexy woman who are interested in them? Try a bookstore under fiction.

I used to work with two guys named Alan Beatty and Neville Buist. The pair made a great  "Beatty and the Buist".

Scientists say they have found the missing link - a little monkey. It lived on mostly twigs and berries, which makes it a direct ancestor of today's supermodel.

The anti-aging ad I'd like to see is a baby covered in cream saying,"Oh, I've used too much!"

I keep my office cold. Just because  my dreams have died, that doesn't mean they shouldn't be well preserved.

"A good education is the next best thing to a pushy mother."

Lord,  give me patience...and the time to recover.

Related articles

• Thursday morning one-liners (profootballtalk.nbcsports.com)
• DIY Project: Envelope Liners (weddingbee.com)
• What was the most inspirational Ecademy Blog in 2010 [William Buist] (ecademy.com)
• Facebook - Let me add you to my groups! [William Buist] (ecademy.com)
• Friday morning one-liners (profootballtalk.nbcsports.com)
• Why do BlackStars get more referrals? [William Buist] (ecademy.com)
• Two New Eye Make Up Looks Made Easy (chicagonow.com)
• POLITI-QUOTES: The week in one-liners (politico.com)

Image via Wikipedia

Arriving down here soon...

By Peter Petterson


First published at Qondio:

Karl wanted everything to be perfect for his anniversary trip to the hotel where he and his wife honey-mooned thirty years before.

So he decided to get up an hour earlier to make all the necessary arrangements. That night he emailed her, but for some inexplicable reason, he misspelt the address and it was sent to a recent widow.

The next day the widow's son found his mother passed out in front of of her computer. On the screen sat this email:

"My darling wife, I've just got here and everything's set for your arrival tomorrow. Hope your trip down here will be as pleasant as mine. P.S. Its really hot!"

http://huttriver.qondio.com

The mystery location of the Garden of Eden...

Image by oak37 via Flickr

The mystery location of the Garden of Eden:

It has been written that there is a great mystery that is concealed in the  Torah story about Avraham's burial of his wife Sarah. And it is also written that this mystery is not just another piece of boring mumbo-jumbo philosophical religious lesson. Interesting!

No, it is claimed that this mystery is about a geological & geographical reality that has been spoken about for centuries in  Torah literature and echoed  in the literature  of numerous cultures around the globe. It is written that this mystery is about the Garden of Eden being a real physical place,  and about its exact location today.

The first two links below have been withdrawn. I wonder why? Read the third.

http://www.koshertorah.com/PDF/eden/pdf

http://idolphin.org/eden/

http://www.unexplainable.net/artman/publish/article_11916.shtml


Southern Iraq:

Biblical scholars reportedly believe tthat the wetlands in southern Iraq are the site of the Garden of Eden. In the 1990's Saddam Hussein had the area drained by diverting its waters in order to punish the locals who had allegedly supported a rebellion against his regime. Nearly two decades later, Azzam an Iraqi American and founder of Nature Iraq, returned in the middle of a war to help restore the area.


But there is another theory about the location of the Garden of Eden: Keep reading Huttriver8.

Related articles

• Akira Garden of Eden Folklorique at Galleria Marchetti: Photo gallery (timeoutny.com)
• Iraqi-American Seeks To Restore 'Garden Of Eden' (npr.org)
• NYFW Day 4: Monique Lhulilier's garden of Eden (charlestoncitypaper.com)
• Garden of Eden at NV Penthouse Lounge: Photo gallery (timeoutny.com)
• Garden of Eden - the models' hangout (teabreak.pk)
• POM Wonderful : Aphrodite [Video] (scaryideas.com)
• 72 Virgins Sent 2,499,928 Reinforcements (michellemalkin.com)

Glasses aren't so geeky after all - could be sexy...

Image by Getty Images via Daylife

Glasses aren’t so geeky after all - could be sexy?



Investing your hard-earned cash in a pair of spectacles is something no person should be ashamed of. In fact, turning a little four-eyed could be the first step to a new, and better, you.



According to the results of a recent survey commissioned by OPSM, wearing glasses improves your employment, sex and fashion appeal.



The online survey of 482 Kiwis by Stellar Market Research found a whopping 74 percent believe that glasses can make people look sexy and 93 percent believe glasses are more stylish than they used to be.



It's definitely time to bin the contact lenses.



More than one in four of those surveyed would consider wearing frames as a fashion accessory, even if they didn't need a prescription. And more than three quarters of people admitted to checking out a potential partner purely because of their eyewear.



Employability is also boosted by a pair of rims. Almost two thirds of people believe wearing glasses helps improve employment chances, while more than half think wearing glasses helps to make a better impression at a job interview and makes a positive first impression in the workplace



MSN-Fashion

Related articles by Zemanta

• The Evolution Of Sunglasses Being A Note Of Fashion (recycleemail.com)
• The Interesting History Of Sun Glasses Being Symbol Of Mode (recycleemail.com)
• Contacts before LASIK (realself.com)
• Eye Moisturizers -- Contacts Lens For Dry Eyes (newmediamedicine.com)
• Are glasses better for the planet than contact lenses? (slate.com)