Friday, February 12, 2010

Australian and Canadian Police versus American police...


Australian and Canadian Police versus American Police:

How can you tell the difference between Canadian, Australian, and American Police?

Pose the following question:

“You’re walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges. You are carrying a Glock 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.”

What do you do?

CANADIAN POLICE CONSTABLES
Answer: (Immediate thought processes)

•Is the knife a ceremonial kirpan?
•Does he prefer to communicate in English or French?
•Will this negatively impact my chances of promotion?
•Is this just his way of telling me that he pays my wages, and wants my
job?
•Would this be an appropriate time to hug him and sing Koombaya?
•Will the media do a profile of him and how he was loved by everyone
including his dog?
•Is the alleged ‘client’ a member of the NDP or an Environmental Group?
•Is he just a squeegee kid / pan handler trying to make a living on the
mean streets?
•Is he a member of a gang that is just ‘misunderstood’ by society?
•Is he an undercover Toronto Star reporter looking for a news breaker?
•Is he a recent illegal immigrant to this country, and just doesn’t know
how to approach the police?
•Is he recently released on parole and hasn’t been properly integrated back
into the community?
•Is he a victim of fetal alcohol syndrome, and just doesn’t understand what
he is doing?
•Warn and Charter him as he approaches.
AUSTRALIAN POLICE CONSTABLES

Answer: BANG!

AMERICAN POLICE OFFICERS

Answer: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! Click…. (Sounds of reloading) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click Click Click

Acknowledgements: Australian blogs


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